Yesterday, I lost my job. This is the third time within a year that I’ve lost a job and it hurts like hell. I’ve been in the BPO industry for 15 years and I’m always one of the best in my level. In 2006, I was an agent and got promoted to the next level after 6 months. When I was hired as a supervisor in a new company, my team was always on top. Then, I got promoted as an operations manager after 5 months, even before my regularization. When I became an operations manager, my cluster was on top for consecutive months. I am very competitive, and I make sure that my agents and supervisors are happy and motivated to work every single day. I make sure to transfer my skills and my goal is to see them grow. Moving to different accounts, I made sure to understand the processes and create a healthy culture. When I became a client services manager, my clients loved me. They were happy with how I work. I had healthy relationships with other departments. And I thought I was indispensable…
Then, Covid-19 happened. And just like that, I lost my job. I lasted in that company for almost five years, total of seven years since I was a rehire, because I believed in their mission and vision. I love the people I work with even if we face challenges daily, they’re like my second home. Unfortunately, I was one of the people that was let go of among others. I felt so bad. I know in my heart, I was doing great with my job, but the inevitable happened and I have no control over it.
Looking for a job during the height of the pandemic was hard, really hard. I used to ace interviews even to the VP/country head level. But this pandemic made me realize that even though you think you’re one of the best, you’re nothing. I was depressed. I have kids to raise, bills to pay and I had to think of ways to earn. I sold baked sushi and cookies to survive until I found an online job. The pay was okay, but I had to move down a level because that’s the closest thing I can get. I was working, but I was not happy. I worked to have money to pay the bills, but passion was not there. It didn’t last long, after about five months – me and my department was let go. Literally no notification, they just deactivated our logins and told us they’re cutting people due to pandemic. I can’t blame them because that’s an online job with no proper contract. But, that happened right before new year of 2021 and I felt bad.
Not too long in January, I got a job as a client services manager. I was so happy to finally get my groove back, and this time I have benefits and health card. Few months in, I was let go of and they said my role was not essential to the account. I was shocked, and broke down. It hurts like a cut of a knife. I started doubting myself. What did I do wrong? Is something wrong with me? Why don’t I feel like myself?
Demotivated. That’s how I feel at this exact moment. I know if a future employer reads this, it might be bad for my next applications. But, in reality, I’ve never felt demotivated in my whole 15 years, except for this. I stayed in companies for years because I always aim for growth. Every time I start in a new company, I give my 200%. I have big dreams and I am a goal getter. But, for the past year, during this pandemic, I can’t find that in me. I am a human being, and I feel pain. I can’t pretend that losing a job is okay because it’s not okay. I am a solo parent for eight years, and not having a job is not okay. I am not okay.
However, knowing myself, I will not let myself be dragged down because some companies can’t keep me. I will stand up, like always. I will look for an employer that will see through me, my skills, capabilities, and value add to the company. I will fight this pandemic, and survive for my kids. Like what they say – when a door closes, a window will open. The Lord is with me, and no one can stop me from fulfilling my dreams.
If you’re reading this and you have a job, be grateful. Love your job and do your best, not everyone has the same privilege as you. If you just lost your job and feel inferior, get up. Update your résumé, apply to all possible employers, not everyone will respond but don’t give up. There’s always a company who will open their door for you. Keep trying.
“Don’t cry over the past, it’s gone. Don’t stress about the future, it hasn’t arrived. Live in the present and make it beautiful.”
Thank you for reading,
2 Replies to “Demotivated…”
Hello! First up, I’m sorry to hear of what happened to you. As someone who had to transfer to a new job amid the pandemic, I can definitely relate to what you said.
With that mentioned, permit me to share my story. I originally left my job in March 2020, and transferred to a new one. I started my new job during the first ECQ — but I was already demotivated by May. That’s when I polished up my resume and submitted my application. What motivated me to leave was the fact that I started having anxiety attacks, and almost getting to the point of insulting my then-supervisor for being too much of an asshole.
I initially thought I would not find another job with the same pay — that I resorted to adding “willing to take a pay cut” in my initial pitches just to have a fighting chance. Fortunately, a company considered me for an opening: The salary was even higher! This subsequently motivated me to file my resignation in July, and I managed to start work in August (and I’m still there until now.)
From the looks of your credentials and work experience, I’m definitely sure that a company or two will find you suitable for their job openings! I wish you luck in your job hunt! 🙂
Awww thank you so much for sharing your story.
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