Last week, I discovered that I have 2 benign tumors (Adenomyosis) and 8 ovarian cysts (PCOS). For now, it’s benign and praying that it will not lead to cancer. The tumors and cysts are growing and multiplying as the years go by. It wasn’t this bad when I had my check up 2 years ago. After knowing my situation, I paused and asked my OB/Aunt, can we still treat this and what are my options? With my case, I can’t do medication anymore because of the size of the tumors, the only option is removal of my uterus (Laparoscopic Hysterectomy), which means I can’t have a baby anymore. Or, try to have another baby but it’s very risky. I paused again for a few seconds and thought, I had a baby at a young age and now I’ll have a problem conceiving a baby when I’m at the right age? What are the odds? I was very sad for a few days and kept on praying. I only told my family, Kaeser, and closest friends. My mom was worried because she had the same illness and had her uterus removed together with her unborn baby when she was 38 years old.
After being down for a few days, I prayed and told myself, I will survive this! The past few days, I’m only thinking of happy thoughts. I’m planning more family bonding, time with friends, launch my business, be even more motivated at work, and ways to be productive. Why? Because if I frown and get depressed again, nothing will happen. It will not solve anything, instead, the people around me will worry about me which I never want them to feel. I’ve had failed relationships in the past, I got cheated on so many times, I’ve been abused physically, emotionally and mentally. I dealt with depression and anxiety before and I won’t let it happen again. I am the queen of the house, I make things work all the time, and this challenge will make me and our family even stronger.
I didn’t write this to get sympathy from people. I just want to share that I’ve been through so much at a young age, but you’ll still see me happy, jolly, and accommodating. I want to inspire people and let them know that there’s a rainbow always after the rain (as the song says).
So you, whoever took the time to read this, I just want to say that you are blessed. Whatever problem you are facing, you can make it! Struggles will always be there, but they will not last forever, always remember that. Pray, think of different ways on how to solve your problem, you have to create action plans (if plan A doesn’t work, you should have a plan B or C), ask help from family/friends, don’t be alone, think positive, and always remind yourself that you are blessed.
Here are some Bible verse that I always go to whenever I face trials, I pray that these scriptures will help you too.
Philippians 4:13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength.
1 Peter 5:7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
This is not my usual travel blog. This is me, the truest of me. I’m sick and facing challenges but I will never stop living. I will be strong for myself and for my loved ones. God is with me.
Thank you for reading.